All about yourself.

There are so many people who are always off trying to find themselves. They end relationships because they have to "look for themselves." This upsets me. Who says that who you are is already planned out, that the person you are meant to be has already been created and that you have to go and look for you? I don't believe this. I think that people are meant to create who they want to be. You are in this life, depending on how you believe, and it is a new one so how is it the person that you are supposed be is already out there? You are who you choose to be. You are who you want to be, you form an image of who you want to be and then you start creating the persona of this image and that is who you are. If you don't like the person that you made then you are at liberty to change that. It's just something that really bothers me when people say that they have to find themselves, because it really doesn't work that way. In the process of "finding" yourself you are in fact creating yourself, even if you are building off of who someone else is, you model yourself after them. I think that everyone should take a step back and think of who they want to be, create that image in your head and then work toward building that person. That's just how I believe.

The Beginning of something good?

It was just another normal night for us. We started out at my house getting ready, make-up, hair and clothes, the essentials. This was going to be the night. I was just a sophomore at the time and he was a junior, but that didn’t matter. My older sisters had warned me about the older guys in high school, that one minute they would make it seem that they want you and the next minute they wanted nothing to do with you. My older brothers said that they would beat the crap out of any guy that did me wrong. I never really listened to what they were saying. I always thought that they just didn’t want me to have any fun or just not have a life. Even my older cousins warned me about going to the parties the other high schoolers were having. And they all absolutely forbade any college parties, if they even heard a whisper about me even considering to go to a college party they would be sure to make it impossible for me to go the party.

            It had actually started my freshman year. I went to my first party. It really wasn’t that great, a few people and no good music. The one good thing at the party was this guy. His name was Jason. Most of the people there were just sitting around, and then in walked Jason. I was sitting on a chair thinking about how I just wanted to get out of there and just go catch a movie. Then Jason grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my chair and started dancing with me. Being nervous and slightly bewildered at his actions I just giggled and kept dancing with him. This went on for just a few minutes and then he whispered in my ear.

“ Do you want to get out of here?” he asked in a low voice

“ Yeah. It’s pretty lame in here,” I whispered back. And just as swiftly as he got me out of my chair he had his hand in mine and was leading toward the door. I turned to see my friends looking at me astonished, I just smiled and shrugged. As an after though I turned and mouthed something, “text me”, then we were out the door.

             We got to his car and he opened the door for me and helped me into the passenger seat.  I couldn’t believe that this was actually happening, I mean I’ve seen it in the movies but never had it happened to me. We went to the theater and watched the newest romantic comedy that was playing. Everything seemed so right then. It seemed that not too long after we’d met that we both graduated and were accepted to the same college. He even turned down his first choice so that he could stay near me. We stayed strong and we never seem to want to stray.

            Even in college we were inseparable. We were both English majors but had different minors, he in sports medicine and me in music.

Untitled (for now)

The girl took a deep breath trying to steady herself. She finished unbuttoning her shirt. She was trying to calm herself. Things were getting out of control. She looked at the figure next to her. She couldn't believe what they were abut to do. It wasn't supposed to happen now. This had been planned for at least two more months, but now the time seemed perfect.
"Are you sure that you want to do this now," the figure asked her.
"Yeah. I'm ready. If we don't hurry up and get started then I might chicken out," she said taking another deep breath. She heard the hum of the needle being turned on. Dom came out of the shadows. She was going to finish her initiation. She really didn't want to be apart of this, but if she didn't comply there could be dire consequences for her family.
"Why is this part so important?" Brooklyn asked Dom.
"Because if anything is to happen to you we will know that you are one of us, it is also a sign to those that can see it that you are a friend. This can keep you from getting killed, it can get you into places that most people can only dream of getting into." Dom said as he pressed the needle to her arm. He was giving Brooklyn her first tattoo that would confirm her as a member of a "secret society" that all the members of her family are in.

There are important rule that one must follow when your family is in this society:
1) Once you became a member there was no way that you could get out. Not even in death.
2) If you tell anyone they should convert.
3) You must follow the orders of an elder.
4) Never tell anyone who/what you are that is outside of the "family".

Brooklyn didn't come into this willingly. It was all just so fast. One minute she was dating this guy and then all of a sudden there were high speed chases, she was seeing things that she was told about as a child but never really believed could be true, things that, even at 22 she still wished that she could be. She didn't realized that she was already one of them, she just needed to dig a little deeper to find it.

Starting College

OK. So yeah. I just started college and it's a whole different world than what most people think. You think "Oh no, it's college. It's going to be so much harder and the people are going to be so mean." But no it's really not. People here accept you for who you are. Unlike high schoolers, people in college encourage you to be different. There really is no popular and not popular, it's just one big mesh of people that are around and you don't have to stick to just one "group" of people. Also when you are in college you can find yourself. No, I'm not saying that in the first two weeks of college that I've found myself, but I see that I can be the person that I want to be, not the person that everyone expects you to be. When I came to college I realized that 99% of these people don't know anything about me, they don't know what I was like in High School so now I can be the person that I wasn't in High School. Now I don't have to worry "Oh is this person going to like me, or oh she might think that I'm weird and probably won't talk to me." I've found that it is easier to talk to others here in college because they have a more open mind about things and they wont make a definitive judgment from the first few words out of your mouth. My favorite part about this is no one can tell you who to be. The professors they seem to like everyone and they don't show any favoritism but then again I have yet to meet all the professors and see how they are around people. And everyone here encourages you to follow your dreams. So what if you are a Philosophy   Major, that doesn't mean that you shouldn't join choir or audition for one of the musicals that the school is producing. This is all a learning experience and I think that everyone who has a mind should at the very least attempt it. Don't say "Oh it's too hard," either because there are so many people willing to help you and the resources, there are so many ways for you to succeed, all you have to do is want it!

High School Ending

It’s really sad that this school year is coming to a close. For me it is different than most, for a lot of us it is different because we are graduating. For the past four years our lives have been filled with the crazy things that have happened. We’ve spent most of our time saying how we couldn’t wait to get out of school, kept saying that we all wanted to get far, far away from here, but when we are far, far away from here, when we get sad and we think back to a happier time most of our thoughts will be right back here, right back in high school. You’ll be thinking of all those days that you stayed up with your best friends talking about the boys you think you’re in love with or that one girl you all hate. You’ll find yourself talking about that one hot guy that you had as a sub in math class and how you were tempted to go to a baseball game but you didn’t want to seem like a stalker (no this did not happen to me but I know who it has happened to). Or you’ll find yourself recounting that crazy day in the really cool teacher’s class when nothing made any sense at all. Or you’ll think about that day when you swore that your life was completely over and that you were absolutely sure that nothing in life would ever be good again.
You will find yourself thinking about that boy that your friend hooked you up with, and that no matter how bad your day was you would talk to him and everything would be ok. Or how you would stay up to ridiculous hours of the night either talking to him or trying to get him off of your mind so that you have some chance of getting some sleep so that you don’t completely fail your math quiz. You’ll think back to that day when you were supposed to go on the senior trip but your permission slip was turned in too late so you couldn’t go, but your two best friends being some of the best friends ever decide to not go, and the three of you skip the study hall you were supposed to be in and go and kill Zombies and play Rock Band. You think of the day when you were having a mental break down and your friend with the awesome dance moves busted into random dance to make you feel better and helped you compose yourself enough to go to your next class.
You’ll think about that crazy ass sleep over when you did random things like go into ball freezing water, or hand a pretty pointless water fight or colored all over each others faces and made random videos about it. Or how you told your friends the most you’ve ever told anyone and you knew that they wouldn’t tell anyone.
You’ll think of spring break when you went to the coast and you got hit on by some creepy guy with an accent and then have him suddenly loose his accent when he finds out that you’re not, in any way of the same heritage of him and all your best friend can do is try not to laugh at you while you’re internally having a panic attack and all you really want to do is get your coffee and get the hell out of that coffee shop.
You don’t really think about how hard things will be when your teachers aren’t there to help you with the major parts and make sure that you will pass class. That you will have to take more initiative in having to go sign up for a tutor and actually go and get help. That out in the real world that you have to have pride, but that you can’t let that pride get in the way of everything.
Most people don’t realize that most of what happens in high school is what you are going to look back on later in life to get you through the hard times. So now is the time to make new friends, settle the ridiculous arguments with the people who really haven’t done anything to you. Now is the time to tell people how you really feel and to not let the childish things get in the way.
With these last few days in school try to make things last dramatic. In fact kill all the drama. Don’t let the end of the year be full of it. Make things more fun. Tell your everyone that you hope that you can see them over the summer and mean it. When you’re signing year books and exchanging numbers make sure that you make actual plans to use those numbers, you don’t have to make epic plans to travel across the states with these people, just make plans to meet up at the park and just hang out there and talk a little while throwing rocks into the water. High school is the time of your life for the next few years when we’re all going to be fighting to find out who we truly are because we are all going to change. Now is the time to just take a step back and be thankful for all that you have. When you have the chance take everything in with a deep breath, don’t try to force things to be amazing just let them be and years from now, when you’re looking back at things, you’ll remember that that extremely seemingly simple moment was one of the most amazing things that happened.

Skipping Days

School.


No one ever really wants to go. Some of us use it as a release. We go to get away form home, but we still have people telling you what to do.


There are some days when you need to be away from home and school. So you tell your parents that you are going to school and you leave for school but you don't go. Yes, most people know how to skip, but I'm just saying it.


Any who, the best way to skip, in my mind, is to do it with your really good friends. You know the ones that you spend most of your time with, the ones who you can tell everything to. The ones that you can be yourself around. You know, those friends.


And what do you do on days that you skip?? That's not the right question. The question is "what not to do on this day?"


But i guess it kinda depends on what kind of day it is. If it is a nice and sunny day and you've got a lot of energy then you should go outside and do something. On days like this you should go to the beach or something or go to a park and play sports.


If it's a rainy day and you have a lot of energy then get some friends together and go to someone's house and play Call Of Duty. Yes, I am a girl and I played with two other girls and two somewhat strange guys. But they are totally amazing people. And the guys were totally for letting us girls get our turn at playing. They weren't  complete jerks and ignored us the whole time.


Going on. On this day that we were skipping it was just one of those days that you want to spend with your friends so that's what we did. We hung out for a while at King Tomulos' house and played COD and drank zip fizz and sprayed each other with glitter spray and made memories.


There is just something about not being in school and being with friends and being free and doing something that makes you happy. Life's too short to spend all the time you have only doing what you're supposed to do. So next time you have some free time think about something that you WANT to do and do it. Don't waste your life being bored with things that make no sense. So get out of the house and go do something fun.

Honesty/Lies

Honesty.

We need it to keep us alive. It establishes trust and much more comes from it. Honesty is the base, the starting point, the… what ever you want to call it,  for every relationship that you have unless you want to build a relationship on lies and bull, but hey! What ever sinks your ship. And bending the truth is lying. Lying is unacceptable! Its hazardous to our people. Lies to other people cause fights , maybe even the killing of a few people. Lies from our “Fearless Leader” causes wars, killing many people, treaties being broken, prices going up, our country possibly becoming overtaken… and many more things that I could go on about for days, but I wont make you  suffer.

Honesty can take us very far in life. Like let’s say that you like someone and they like you too. And let’s say that this person wants to know whether or not you like them and you are dishonest, you are left wondering “what if”, and that’s never good. It causes all kinds of distractions.

Honesty can get you to new heights. Like if you are at concert and someone asks you your opinion of the show and you give your truthfully amazing over view of what is going on, you could be getting paid to go on tour and to concerts and tell people your opinion on what you think of the band. You little old you, doing big things, influencing others.

Dishonesty can take you to new places. Like to prison. Lets say you see a murder and you know the person who committed the murder. You go to court and get sworn in and you say “Oh, no, Your Majesty, Mr./Mrs. Judge Person, It was not this person who let me tell you again, who just happens to be my good friend/drug dealer. No s/he was with me all night in my bedroom playing Naked Twister and Scattergories.”  That is something called a lie and your just perjured yourself, and your ass could be in prison, possibly for life.

Yeah, I know that our politicians lie. A lot. And no, it’s not right. But they do it and we fall for the lies. I think we should be able to torture them. Ok maybe not torture them, but make them straight up tell us what their intentions are. So that way we can skip the wars, the recessions, and all the bull crap they put us through.

Maybe we should be a little bit like Europe and Australia and other places where everyone has health care and the only thing you have to worry about is buying food and clothes and boob jobs for your mistress. I think that we need to be honest here and say that our country is greedy and that we need to stop being so money hungry. We need to be honest to our parents, to our friends (how can you be someone’s friend if you lie to them), to our teachers, and for that matter to our enemies. It’s just as simple as that.

High School

High School.

We all love to hate it.

One day it is the best thing , the next day it is the worst. We all have to attend this place at one point or another but what the hell, it's a free education and it will help you in life. I know that one day you will bitch about all the homework and the next day it will be about the drama(because believe me, there is a lot of it). but before you let it all get to you take a deep breath and think about what a wonderful learning experience this is. Without High School you wouldn't make halfway through life. High School hardens you. This is the place where you learn to forget about all the negativity and just think about the positive and make yourself into who you want to be. This is where a lot of growing happens too. I mean at the beginning you will be this immature person who never thinks about what they say or do, by junior year, you will think before you speak. You will learn to tell the difference between the people that you want to surround yourself with. But senior year, you will become a mix of an immature person and someone who will freak out because they failed one quiz. Or maybe that's just me, but then again with the life that i had i have the right to be the way i am. In High School you will be so overwhelmed by things that you will honestly want to kill someone or something. Let me tell you something; this is not the best thing to do. When you get frustrated the best thing to do is do your work. Not that i do mine, but seeing as how my high school career is ending...

Any way no matter how bad High School seems don't let  it get to you. Use it as a growing experience, and you will actually make it far in life believe me.