All about yourself.

There are so many people who are always off trying to find themselves. They end relationships because they have to "look for themselves." This upsets me. Who says that who you are is already planned out, that the person you are meant to be has already been created and that you have to go and look for you? I don't believe this. I think that people are meant to create who they want to be. You are in this life, depending on how you believe, and it is a new one so how is it the person that you are supposed be is already out there? You are who you choose to be. You are who you want to be, you form an image of who you want to be and then you start creating the persona of this image and that is who you are. If you don't like the person that you made then you are at liberty to change that. It's just something that really bothers me when people say that they have to find themselves, because it really doesn't work that way. In the process of "finding" yourself you are in fact creating yourself, even if you are building off of who someone else is, you model yourself after them. I think that everyone should take a step back and think of who they want to be, create that image in your head and then work toward building that person. That's just how I believe.

The Beginning of something good?

It was just another normal night for us. We started out at my house getting ready, make-up, hair and clothes, the essentials. This was going to be the night. I was just a sophomore at the time and he was a junior, but that didn’t matter. My older sisters had warned me about the older guys in high school, that one minute they would make it seem that they want you and the next minute they wanted nothing to do with you. My older brothers said that they would beat the crap out of any guy that did me wrong. I never really listened to what they were saying. I always thought that they just didn’t want me to have any fun or just not have a life. Even my older cousins warned me about going to the parties the other high schoolers were having. And they all absolutely forbade any college parties, if they even heard a whisper about me even considering to go to a college party they would be sure to make it impossible for me to go the party.

            It had actually started my freshman year. I went to my first party. It really wasn’t that great, a few people and no good music. The one good thing at the party was this guy. His name was Jason. Most of the people there were just sitting around, and then in walked Jason. I was sitting on a chair thinking about how I just wanted to get out of there and just go catch a movie. Then Jason grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my chair and started dancing with me. Being nervous and slightly bewildered at his actions I just giggled and kept dancing with him. This went on for just a few minutes and then he whispered in my ear.

“ Do you want to get out of here?” he asked in a low voice

“ Yeah. It’s pretty lame in here,” I whispered back. And just as swiftly as he got me out of my chair he had his hand in mine and was leading toward the door. I turned to see my friends looking at me astonished, I just smiled and shrugged. As an after though I turned and mouthed something, “text me”, then we were out the door.

             We got to his car and he opened the door for me and helped me into the passenger seat.  I couldn’t believe that this was actually happening, I mean I’ve seen it in the movies but never had it happened to me. We went to the theater and watched the newest romantic comedy that was playing. Everything seemed so right then. It seemed that not too long after we’d met that we both graduated and were accepted to the same college. He even turned down his first choice so that he could stay near me. We stayed strong and we never seem to want to stray.

            Even in college we were inseparable. We were both English majors but had different minors, he in sports medicine and me in music.

Untitled (for now)

The girl took a deep breath trying to steady herself. She finished unbuttoning her shirt. She was trying to calm herself. Things were getting out of control. She looked at the figure next to her. She couldn't believe what they were abut to do. It wasn't supposed to happen now. This had been planned for at least two more months, but now the time seemed perfect.
"Are you sure that you want to do this now," the figure asked her.
"Yeah. I'm ready. If we don't hurry up and get started then I might chicken out," she said taking another deep breath. She heard the hum of the needle being turned on. Dom came out of the shadows. She was going to finish her initiation. She really didn't want to be apart of this, but if she didn't comply there could be dire consequences for her family.
"Why is this part so important?" Brooklyn asked Dom.
"Because if anything is to happen to you we will know that you are one of us, it is also a sign to those that can see it that you are a friend. This can keep you from getting killed, it can get you into places that most people can only dream of getting into." Dom said as he pressed the needle to her arm. He was giving Brooklyn her first tattoo that would confirm her as a member of a "secret society" that all the members of her family are in.

There are important rule that one must follow when your family is in this society:
1) Once you became a member there was no way that you could get out. Not even in death.
2) If you tell anyone they should convert.
3) You must follow the orders of an elder.
4) Never tell anyone who/what you are that is outside of the "family".

Brooklyn didn't come into this willingly. It was all just so fast. One minute she was dating this guy and then all of a sudden there were high speed chases, she was seeing things that she was told about as a child but never really believed could be true, things that, even at 22 she still wished that she could be. She didn't realized that she was already one of them, she just needed to dig a little deeper to find it.

Starting College

OK. So yeah. I just started college and it's a whole different world than what most people think. You think "Oh no, it's college. It's going to be so much harder and the people are going to be so mean." But no it's really not. People here accept you for who you are. Unlike high schoolers, people in college encourage you to be different. There really is no popular and not popular, it's just one big mesh of people that are around and you don't have to stick to just one "group" of people. Also when you are in college you can find yourself. No, I'm not saying that in the first two weeks of college that I've found myself, but I see that I can be the person that I want to be, not the person that everyone expects you to be. When I came to college I realized that 99% of these people don't know anything about me, they don't know what I was like in High School so now I can be the person that I wasn't in High School. Now I don't have to worry "Oh is this person going to like me, or oh she might think that I'm weird and probably won't talk to me." I've found that it is easier to talk to others here in college because they have a more open mind about things and they wont make a definitive judgment from the first few words out of your mouth. My favorite part about this is no one can tell you who to be. The professors they seem to like everyone and they don't show any favoritism but then again I have yet to meet all the professors and see how they are around people. And everyone here encourages you to follow your dreams. So what if you are a Philosophy   Major, that doesn't mean that you shouldn't join choir or audition for one of the musicals that the school is producing. This is all a learning experience and I think that everyone who has a mind should at the very least attempt it. Don't say "Oh it's too hard," either because there are so many people willing to help you and the resources, there are so many ways for you to succeed, all you have to do is want it!